


Deserving Each Other

by bgn



Category: The Boondock Saints RPF
Genre: Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-14
Updated: 2014-09-14
Packaged: 2018-02-17 07:42:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2301878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bgn/pseuds/bgn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My version of how Flanery and Reedus get together.<br/>Read the sequel Walking Saints for three Flandus crossovers between Boondock Saints and Walking Dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Deserving Each Other

Sean Patrick Flanery wondered once or twice while growing up if his sexual orientation was exclusively female. It wasn't that he was interested in guys exactly, just curious, and he decided that was normal enough not to worry about. But he also never satisfied his curiosity because that behavior wasn't encouraged in Texas. When he moved to California where he might have explored it a little, there was still a stigma to being gay if you were interested in certain roles. His acting career was taking off so he opted for women. It just seemed easier. He wasn't even sure he wanted a male partner and it definitely wasn't a necessity. He almost changed his mind about that when he met Norman Reedus.

Reedus was beautiful and the word in no way diminished masculinity. His eyes and mouth, that body, the way he held a cigarette and smoked it. He'd been a model and while he looked fucking fantastic in clothes, Sean wished that he wouldn't have to imagine him without clothes. The 'Phone Call from Ma' scene during shooting helped but there were too many people around to really enjoy it. The memory was great for jerking off later, though. Sean was fascinated by Norman the artist as well. The guy painted, sculpted, took photographs. And he had a wicked sense of humor besides. There were moments when Sean wondered if Norman might feel more than camaraderie but he dismissed the idea when he heard that Norman was involved with a supermodel and they were expecting a baby.

Troy Duffy was pleased with the chemistry between his lead actors. It was exactly what he'd hoped for the brothers in his Boondock Saints script. Sean loved working with Norman but it was also torture at times. By then he had met supermodel Helena and liked her and that was another reason not to let his thoughts stray beyond friendship for his co-star. Afterwards they kept in touch but were busy enough that they didn't see each other often. It was almost two years before he saw them again and met their son. Mingus was adorable and he was one more reason for Sean to put Norman firmly from his mind.

Sean and Sacha hadn't been dating long when she surprised him by suggesting that they have a child together. The more he thought about it, the more sense it made. This was his chance at fatherhood. He liked Sacha but he had no illusions that they would be together forever. He didn't catch on until later that Sacha was more interested in his sperm than the man providing it. She thought he had good genes.

He was invited to Mingus' fifth birthday party soon after and suffered a pang when he found out Norman and Helena were no longer together. But he and Sacha had just decided to try for a baby and he was excited about the possibility of fatherhood. It was time to stop obsessing about someone he couldn't have. But he couldn't completely block thoughts of what might have been if only they had better timing. Meanwhile, Sean was away a lot and it took a year to get pregnant. He got the impression that Sacha had hoped for quicker results and was about to end it when the stick finally turned blue. The pregnancy revived their relationship briefly but even happiness at Lola's birth couldn't carry them further. They separated soon after.

When it was over with Sacha the first thing Sean wondered was if Norman was with anyone. By now he knew he hadn't imagined that spark between them. It was more than mere friendship. He was thinking about an approach when he was invited to join a Boondock Saints panel at an upcoming convention. Norman and Troy were also invited and all three planned to go.

* * *

Norman Reedus had left home early and lived all over the world. It gave you a different perspective, especially at a young age. He'd always been interested in art but that didn't pay many bills so when he returned to California he fixed motorcycles until drifting into acting and modeling. Norman had always been as aware of men as he was of women. He saw bodies in terms of lines and angles and curves. He looked at life with an artist's eye and tended to live inside his own head sometimes. He'd taken a few roles in gay themed films but that was just acting. He wanted to work and the parts were interesting. Some people thought artists must be into every kink but just being open to possibilities didn't mean he was totally devoid of discrimination. Not the last few years anyway. There had been some half-drunk, half-joking fumbles with guys. Hands down pants, cock squeezes given and received. Did that even count? It hadn't gone further and he hadn't felt like pursuing it. He'd also had a few girlfriends who didn't mean much. Then he met Helena and they decided to have a baby right away.

He hadn't seriously considered a male sex partner until he met Sean Patrick Flanery. His first thought caught him off-guard. 'What would it be like to fuck Flanery?' immediately followed by 'I want to find out.' He backed away from it because he was with Helena and she was pregnant. But Norman couldn't deny that there had been an instant connection between them. It wasn't just emotional, either. He didn't want to think of himself as shallow but Sean's physical attributes were impossible to overlook. That smile, his eyes, the long lean body perfectly tanned and toned. He was into martial arts and it showed. And he was funny – voices, expressions, stories. Norman felt like a slug in comparison. A pale inactive slug that smoked too much.

Norman and Helena were together for five years. They tried to make it work for longer than they should have and they got along much better after they realized it was over. They both loved their son and they shared parenting with few conflicts. After they separated he was busy being a father and concentrating on work. But thoughts of Sean intruded more insistently. They hadn't been in touch recently so Norman invited Sean to Mingo's birthday party. He hoped that something might develop but instead he learned that Sean and Sacha were trying to have a baby.

He could hardly blame Sean for wanting something he'd had at a much younger age. But it didn't matter now, Sean was off limits. Norman wasn't going to mess with a relationship when a child was involved or about to be. The accident in Berlin put Sean out of his mind for awhile and the news that Sean had a daughter made Norman try to shut off thoughts of him entirely. He wasn't very happy but he had his son and art and acting. Norman had resigned himself to his current existence when he heard that Sean and Sacha were no longer together. He knew he wasn't over Sean and probably never would be. Norman was tired of fighting it and now there was no reason not to at least explore the possibility. He was thinking about how to make that happen when Norman, Sean and Troy were invited to a convention that included a panel about Boondock Saints.

* * *

The moment their eyes met they knew this thing between them would be settled today. But first they had to deal with the reason they were here.

Boondock Saints had been released six years before but didn't become popular until a few years later. It had been gaining momentum ever since. The panel was fun and the fans were great, very appreciative, and begging for a sequel. Troy had news that it would really happen soon and people went crazy even though previous rumors hadn't come to pass. It did seem solid this time.

When they were finished Troy asked them to stick around for awhile and meet a couple of producers later. That was fine, they wanted time to talk if they could find a private spot. The small conference rooms were being used for interviews. Heading down a deserted corridor they got lucky and discovered the last room was empty except for a table and chairs. They finally confessed everything they'd thought and felt about each other since they met, leaning closer as the talk got quieter and more intense. As the conversation wound down they just mutually closed the gap and kissed, hands reaching to cup each other's face. Sean broke the kiss once to touch his tongue above the corner of Norman's mouth. That fucking mole all by itself could make him hard just thinking about it. Lip-locked again, they moved around the table so they could wrap each other up. It felt good, it felt right. But pretty soon it wasn't enough. Sean wanted to satisfy his long-delayed curiosity. He reached for Norman's jeans and unzipped them carefully because Norman was as hard as Sean.

"Are we really doing this?" Norman asked. "Right here?"

"Only if you want to."

Norman closed his eyes. He couldn't stop a smile. "Oh fuck yes."

Sean wedged a chair under the door knob. "Just in case. It's locked but we don't need maintenance barging in."

Norman wasn't usually passive when it came to sex but he was enjoying take-charge Sean. Sean pulled Norman's jeans and underwear down and knelt in front of him. This wasn't the place for everything he'd like to do eventually but options were limited right now - hand or blowjob being the most likely - and Sean had no intention of letting Norman come without tasting his cock.

A problem presented itself with the touch of Sean's tongue and hands to that cock. Norman moaned and his knees buckled. Sean wasn't sure how long Norman could remain standing. "Back up a foot, move six inches to your left, and sit."

Norman obeyed without hesitation.

"You should be an actor," Sean said. "You take direction well and you hit your mark."

Norman laughed. Sean was so loose and easy and fun. It had always been that way between them. The subtle difference between Sean's mouth and female mouths he'd experienced was surprising. He could barely stay on his feet and was grateful that Sean had told him to sit down. Norman found himself clamping his mouth shut because he knew he'd make way too much noise if he lost control. He hoped Sean wouldn't think his silence meant he wasn't enjoying it. He was unprepared for the force of his orgasm and the feelings that went with it. Eyes closed, hands clenched in Sean's hair, trying to get his breathing under control, he finally opened his eyes to see that familiar smile on Sean's face, the one that crinkled his eyes at the corners and was so infectious that everyone around him smiled. Norman was no exception.

He kissed Sean, tasting himself on Sean's tongue. "I hope you could tell how much I liked that. I was afraid I'd scream if I opened my mouth."

"I could tell," Sean said. "And only one mouth needed to be open anyway."

"My turn," Norman said.

Sean got to his feet a little stiffly. The front of his jeans was way too tight. He put his hands on Norman's shoulders to stop him from standing. "Stay there." Sean unzipped and pulled down his jeans and underwear. "Oh fuck, it feels like my dick is going to break off." He sat on the edge of the table and pulled Norman's chair between his legs.

All Norman's senses went into overdrive when his lips met Sean's cock. The sight of it moving in and out of his mouth, the wet sounds of sucking and tongue lapping, alternating rough and smooth textures in his mouth and against exploring fingers, a scent and taste that would forever be uniquely Sean. Sean was unable to keep his mouth closed as Norman had. He was making unintelligible sounds that were gaining volume by the time he climaxed.

"Is that dick-breaking problem solved?" Norman asked.

"Maybe permanently," Sean said, laying flat on the table. "I feel like I might not get hard or come again. Ever. If I wasn't trying to quit, I'd need a cigarette."

"Good idea," Norman said, reaching for his cigarettes and lighter.

"Uh-uh." Sean shook his head and pointed to the sprinkler above them.

"Fucking fire codes," Norman said without any real heat. He offered Sean a hand and pulled him upright. They kissed slowly and thoroughly, with affection this time instead of lust. "You might replace cigarettes as my oral fixation."

They arranged their clothes and smoothed their hair. Just before Norman opened the door, Sean sniffed. "It smells exactly like what we were just doing. I hope no one is waiting for the room."

The corridor was still deserted. They left the door open and then opened the exit door opposite to let a little fresh air blow through. They leaned in the doorway, each with a cigarette to show they were just a couple of guys on a smoke break.

A woman with a notebook and video equipment came towards them, spotted the empty room and called up the hall "Hey, here's a room!" She turned to Sean and Norman. "Unless you're using it?"

Sean blew smoke out the exit door. "Nope, it's free as far as I know."

Norman took a drag. "A couple just left but it looked like they were finished."

The woman nodded. A man and woman joined her and the door shut behind them.

Sean had smoked the first cigarette as part of his act with Norman. He lit the second one because he knew he wasn't going to quit after all. "Nice," he said admiringly. "It should be aired out by now but if they do recognize a certain scent, that couple who fled the scene will be blamed."

Norman frowned. "You don't think I overplayed it? Unsolicited explanations sound suspicious."

Sean considered the matter. "Nah, it was offhand, natural. Just a little helpful information."

Troy called and they went to meet the producers he was courting. After making nice they were free to go. Norman had taxied from his hotel so he rode with Sean to Sean's house. They had a sandwich and talked about embarking on a serious relationship. They both wanted it very much and despite living on different coasts were sure they could make it work. It wasn't like Sean was never in New York and Norman was never in L.A. Right now was a case in point with Norman in L.A. for the weekend. Even in this age of instant communication, their business often required face-to-face meetings and this kind of thing happened fairly frequently. And if there was no professional need to visit L.A. or New York, seeing each other was more than enough reason for a quick trip.

They'd been lounging on the sofa. A beer with lunch was followed by a few more. They were nowhere near drunk but there was a pleasant buzz and they started fooling around. It was nice to feel free to touch each other. They moved to the bedroom as events progressed. There was lube available, not because Sean had planned to bugger Reedus but because it was leftover from Sacha who, as Sean had suspected, wanted a baby daddy more than a lover. Sometimes neither he nor the sex was enough to make her wet. Humiliating but true. But this time he had a partner who was aching for it as much as he was. And this time Norman didn't silence his pleasure. The new sensations overwhelmed them. In spite of the unfamiliar act, or maybe because of it, they came almost embarrassingly fast.

"Oh fuck," Norman mumbled when he had regained the power of speech. "That was ... fuck ... it was ... fucking ... amazing." Thus proving that speech and coherency do not always go hand in hand. But Sean seemed to have no trouble deciphering Norman's meaning. Plus he'd finally been able to see Norman naked for his eyes only.

They were immediately comfortable as lovers. Not surprising since they'd known each other for years, been friends since they met, and much more in their own minds before they got together.

Sean kissed around Norman's left eye. "You look good. They fixed you up nice after the accident. I wanted to see you but thought I better not."

"I heard you checked on me. I was fucked up at the time but I healed pretty quickly. Need to hit the gym, I'm out of shape."

Sean could tell Norman was up a few pounds but despite being a fitness freak about himself he kind of liked the extra weight on Reedus who was usually so lean and hard. A little softness suited him. But he knew it wouldn't last long. Sean ran his hands along Norman's arms, around his back, across his chest and belly, down his legs.

"Are you feeling me up?"

"Professionally only this time. You got nothing to worry about. Muscle tone is fine, it just needs a little exercise. You were inactive after the accident and I bet you didn't give up drinking to compensate. If you're serious I can give you a workout."

"You just did."

"Hey, I was doing most of the work. You'll get your turn."

"Would your workouts exercise anything but my cock? Because that I've been taking care of myself."

"All by yourself?"

"Recently, yeah."

"How often?"

"Couple of times a week."

"Ever think of me?"

"Yeah. You?"

"Do I think of me when I'm jerking off? No, I think of you."

"How was I?"

"My imagination is good but you're still better in the flesh. So to speak."

"When's the last time you got laid before today?"

"Oh fuck, do I have to admit how long it's been?"

"I'll go first. Ten months."

"I feel better. Nine months."

"But you and Sacha were together until a couple of months ago."

"She was pregnant and then Lola was born. We only did it a couple of times after we found out."

"Her choice or yours?"

"Hers. I would have kept fucking her, but by then I was thinking of you anyway. What about you? You've had girlfriends since Helena."

"Only two and they didn't last long. I've been busy with Mingo and then I was in the accident."

"Well, hell, we'll still do better even living at opposite ends of the country. We'll probably see each other every couple of months, maybe six weeks."

"We're not going to save ourselves until then, are we?"

"Do you have that much control?” Sean asked. “Because I don't."

"Fuck no."

"Phone sex! We need to get on the same calling plan."

"I don't even care about the fucking minutes."

They decided to go out and celebrate. Their preference was for jeans and tee shirts and a bar but they got recognized as The Saints too often now and they didn't want that tonight. So they would go a little upscale to ensure quiet and privacy. They showered and Sean dressed for dinner then they stopped at Norman's hotel so he could change. They ended up back at the hotel for the night, having imbibed a little freely with dinner and the hotel was within walking distance. L.A. is horrified at the idea of walking instead of driving. The valet practically begged them to let him get a taxi but Norman the New Yorker called him a pussy and the new lovers walked. They were sobering up by the time they reached Norman's room but it had been a big day with a lot of conversation and a considerable amount of action. They were tired so they went to bed and slept and liked waking up together the next morning.

They talked about who they planned to tell and decided it would be Helena and Mingus only. Maybe more family later. Sean wasn't going to tell Sacha, at least not right away. "She might not let me see my kid. I'm not sure she'd play that card but it's fucked up between us right now and I don't want to risk it."

There'd been a lot of firsts the day before so Sean wasn't going to ask but he didn't have to because Norman wanted to finally answer the question of what it would be like to fuck Flanery. Afterward Sean's eyes looked a little glazed over.

"Having worked with you on Boondock Saints with the constant rewrites and last minute changes, I'm aware that you're a quick study. Otherwise I would have to assume that you've done this before. A lot. Because that was fucking incredible." Sean's tone was serious. "But don't think I'm your bitch because of great sex. I'm your bitch because I love you." He paused. "And the sex is great."

Norman laughed, and then he got serious as well. "I love you, too. I've said that a few times when it wasn't really true and I want you to know that you and my son are the two times I've meant it."

"Me, too," Sean said quietly. "You and my daughter." He sighed. "The kids. We need to decide how to handle that. We don't need to worry about Lola yet. But Mingus is almost seven."

Norman nodded. "Let me think about it."

* * *

Norman was back in New York and nervous about the talk he was going to have with his son. He and Mingo were close and Norman would have said they could talk about anything but he hadn't considered how to bring up this particular subject. He made sure they would have time without interruption and jumped right in.

"Do you know what it means when two men are together, or two women, instead of a man and a woman?"

"They're gay or lesbian," Mingus replied. "Justin's got a dad and a step-mom, and a mom and another step-mom. And Cilla's mom and dad are divorced. Her dad has a boyfriend."

"Your mom has boyfriends and I've had girlfriends. Would it bother you if I had a boyfriend?"

"Would he live here?"

"No, but he'd visit sometimes."

"Where does he live?"

"California. His name is Sean."

"Would we go there sometimes?"

"Yes. Well, I would and you can come if you want to, but you don't have to."

"Would I have my own room?"

"Yeah, Sean has a room for you."

"Does he have kids?"

"He has a daughter but she's a baby. She lives with her mother."

"No boys?"

"Nope. Is that a problem?"

"I guess not. When would we go?"

"Maybe later this year. Sean is coming to New York next weekend. Is it okay if he stays here?"

"What if he doesn't like me?"

"He already likes you. You've met before but you were only five."

"What if I don't like him?"

"Then he won't stay here when you're here. He would visit when you're with your mom."

"What does he look like?"

Norman showed him a picture. Mingus studied it for a moment then smiled and said, "Moon In My Room!"

"That's right. He gave you that for your fifth birthday."

"He didn't give me anything last year."

"We didn't invite him to your party. The fifth was a big one. Last year was school friends."

"But we'd invite him if you were together?"

"Sure, but he might not be able to come if he was working. He's an actor, too."

"If he was invited, would he send a present even if he couldn't come?"

Norman stared at his son who looked sweet and innocent. Cunning takes many forms.

"Is that the deal? I can have a boyfriend if he buys you birthday presents?"

"And Christmas."

"I want you to know that Sean is the kind of guy who would want to give you presents. He doesn't have to be blackmailed."

"So everybody wins."

* * *

Norman called Sean that night.

"How did it go?" Sean blurted as soon as he saw the caller ID.

"Turns out my kid can be bought with his own room at your house and presents for his birthday and Christmas."

"I'd give him all that anyway."

"Yeah, but he was so cute when he was bargaining that I let him think he was making a deal."

"Seriously," Sean said, "Is he okay with it?"

"I think so. He has friends with two dads or two moms. Kids grow up with something, it seems natural. Every generation has something new. Computers, cell phones, same-sex relationships."

"Maybe we won't have to go through this with Lola."

"Probably not, you lucky bastard."

* * *

Sean arrived after lunch on Saturday. He was great with kids. Actually he was great with men, women, kids, seniors. He was a people person. He looked relaxed even though Norman suspected he wasn't, and he gave Mingus his full attention while asking him about school and friends and how his mother was.

Sean was careful not to be around them every minute. He had phone calls to make, needed a nap for jet lag, there were lots of reasons to make sure that Norman and his son had time alone together. Sean and Norman had agreed that they didn't want Mingus to feel like all his dad's attention would be on Sean when he was around. It seemed to be a good plan because the result was that Mingus included Sean on his own, calling him to dinner instead of letting Norman do it and asking Sean to his bedroom to say good night.

In bed later they talked quietly, thankful that they were off to a good start and hoping the next day would be as smooth. They hadn't seen each other for a few weeks and although they managed to relieve some tension, it wasn't the best sex. They didn't expect it to be. They knew it would take a while to be comfortable with Mingus down the hall.

As Norman slowly woke up he became aware that the bed beside him was empty and there were muffled voices beyond the closed bedroom door. One was light and childish followed by Sean's deeper tones. His son and his partner were morning people. He was outnumbered. Norman pulled on sleep pants and a tee shirt and stumbled to the kitchen. Mingus was in pajamas and Sean in sleep pants and a tee shirt like Norman. They were eating wheat toast and fruit with no muffins or donuts in sight. Mingus had juice and Sean had coffee. Norman kissed his son's head and mumbled good morning. Sean had already poured coffee; he handed the mug to Norman. Norman was so grateful that without thinking he kissed Sean's forehead. Mingus didn't seem to mind. He and Sean were already becoming friends.

After Helena picked Mingus up, Norman leaned in the doorway with hands in pockets. Sean sprawled on the sofa. They were both relieved that the first visit was over.

"That went unbelievably well," Sean said.

Norman nodded. "We were all on best behavior. But it won't always be that easy."

"Couldn't possibly be," Sean agreed.

"Mingus has tantrums occasionally," Norman went on. "And we're both moody sometimes."

"That's an interesting distinction you make: Tantrums and moods."

"After puberty they're called moods so it sounds less like boys who haven't grown up."

"You're a wise father. I can learn from you."

"Won't do much good. You've got a daughter and that's a whole different thing. I'm better with testosterone than estrogen."

"Oh Christ," Sean groaned. "I'm screwed. I definitely have to stay on good terms with her mother."

"That's a good idea anyway."

"In theory," Sean said. "Execution is harder."

Norman sat down close. "Speaking of hard, I am. And we're alone."

* * *

Sean called from California at 8 one evening. It was 11 in New York. His voice was tense. "I have to have a colonoscopy." Dead silence for a few moments. "Are you there?"

Norman's voice was tight. "What happened? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's a baseline test."

"Jesus fuck, Sean!" Norman shouted. "Don't do that to me. I thought you were sick. I thought you started bleeding or something!"

"Oh fuck, I didn't think about that."

"Your voice sounded strange, too."

"That's because I found out what's involved. It's a real shitty situation, you know." Then Sean heard a faint voice through the phone:

"Daddy, is Sean hurt?" Mingus was out of bed and sounded near tears.

"No, no, he's fine," Norman said quickly. "I misunderstood. I'm sorry I woke you up."

"Can I talk to him?"

Norman handed over the phone.

"Hi, Sean." Mingus' voice was anxious. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine, Mingo. Really. I'm sorry you were upset. It was my fault. You okay now?"

"If you are."

"I promise I'm okay. And I'll see you in a couple of weeks. Think you can go back to sleep?"

"I guess so."

"Call me in the morning before school if you want to." It would be an ungodly hour in California and he'd planned to sleep in but Sean didn't care. "I love you."

"Love you back."

"Hang on," Norman said to Sean as he put the phone down. He carried his son back to bed and tucked him in.

Norman returned a few minutes later. "All right, I shouldn't have yelled but you gotta share some blame. Do you see what happened here? I woke our son up and made him cry. I'm an asshole."

Pause. "You said 'our son'."

"Yeah."

"You mean it?"

"Of course. He's yours and mine and Helena's."

"Thanks, man. God, I'm sorry he was worried."

"He'll probably have forgotten it by morning."

"I hope so."

"If he has, I'll remind him to call you. It'll be 4 am your time." Norman couldn't resist the jab.

"I wasn't up with him at night when he was a baby so I'll take my turn now." Sean hesitated. "I think of Lola as ours, too, but it's different because I hardly get to see her."

"I know. That'll change as she gets older." Norman knew Sean was unhappy that he wasn't closer to his daughter.

"I know why you freaked out when you thought I was bleeding. I told you I wasn't hurt." The last time Norman topped Sean he hadn't prepped well and it was painful when he started to enter. He stopped right away but he'd felt bad. "I wouldn't need a colonoscopy for that anyway."

"Yeah, well, I did think of it."

"Stop thinking about it now. Besides, it wouldn't have happened if you weren't so fucking big."

"You're longer."

"You're thicker."

"Are we arguing about dick size?” Norman asked. “Is that what we've come to?"

"Apparently. But we can move on to other body parts."

"Your ass is like a sculpture. In fact I should sculpt it. And your back. The musculature, your shoulders tapering to your hips." When Norman went into artist mode he could elaborate on every detail in his mind's eye. It was nice to hear because he meant it but Sean cut him off anyway.

"Your testes are perfectly symmetrical."

"You just referred to my balls as testes?"

"It was on my word-of-the day calendar."

"No, it fucking well was not."

"You're right, the word was symmetrical. I'm not sure where testes came from ... uhhh." There was a sudden catch in Sean's voice that made Norman suspicious.

"Are you touching yourself? Did you start without me?"

"Like you can't catch up in 30 seconds," Sean said. "Go!"

Thirty seconds later Norman's breathing was uneven.

"Are you caught up?" Sean asked.

"Oh fuck, I think I pulled ahead."

"Well stop pulling for a minute!"

"Can't ... oh fuck ... too close ... uhhh ... fuuuck." Norman released a long shuddering sigh.

"Feel better?"

"Yesss."

"I'm happy for you. But I gotta say I'm feeling a little left out. And frustrated."

"Couldn't slow down."

"Impulsive. Selfish." Sean wasn't mad. In fact, he'd stopped rubbing himself just for the pleasure of hearing Norman come. But no harm if Norman thought he really was a little pissed off. He heard the lighter click. "And now you're smoking. You'll be asleep soon because you're satisfied and it's all about you. Don't bother to stay awake and give me a hand, figuratively speaking. Or a mouth. You could tell me what you'd be doing to me if you were here but I don't want to put you to any trouble ... oh fuck ... uhhh." Sean groaned and was silent.

"You just came!"

"Mmm."

"How can you keep talking like nothing else is going on right up to the second you shoot? How is that even fucking possible? At that point all I can do is grunt."

"I'm articulate."

"You're an asshole. When's your appointment?"

"Next month. The 26th."

"I'll fly out for it."

"You could probably do the procedure. You're more familiar with the area than my doctor."

"Only the opening. My expertise ends eight inches in."

"That's funny. Because your cock ends five inches in."

"Six. And yes, we've established that you're longer."

"I'm not eight inches ... quite. And you're wider."

"Isn't this where we started?"

"Yeah. You sleepy?"

"Mmm."

"Then say goodnight."

"G'night. Love you."

"Love you, too. Talk to you tomorrow."

* * *

A quick trip to California. Mingus was in school so Norman was on his own. Until he got to Sean's house of course.

"I think it was my turn to come to New York," Sean said.

"I don't count my last visit for your medical procedure."

Sean shuddered. "Fuck no. Disgusting. And no sex. Let's not even talk about it."

The lack of sex was remedied almost immediately. Afterwards they smoked in companionable silence. It was reassuring to know they could have each other whenever they wanted. Not exactly, of course, since they lived apart, but no longer having to consider anyone else's claim on each other.

Cigarettes out, they turned and spooned, a move that had become natural. Sean spoke: "Are we cuddling?"

"Are you going to be weird if I say yes?"

"Smecker would say, 'What a pair of fags'."

"Smecker is a fictional character."

"But that fucking Dafoe made him real. God, that guy could deliver his lines. Especially that one. How many takes was it?"

"18 or 20. All good, just a little different. It made Troy crazy picking one for the final cut."

"Same with Rocco. 'Is it dead'?"

Norman laughed, remembering. "Those were funny scenes."

"Still are. We all laugh every time."

"That gag reel with every take one after another. Everybody at the wrap party was on the fucking floor."

Their laughter finally subsided.

"You know, this doesn't feel faggy," Sean said.

"Oh fuck, here comes the weird."

"I'm just saying this thing with us doesn't seem as gay as I expected."

"Disappointed?"

"Relieved."

"You know, a lot of those voices you do are exaggerated stereotypes for easier recognition. You gotta remember that most gays don't act 'gay'. We don't."

"Yeah. This won't fuck up our kids, will it?"

"No."

"You're so certain?"

"Pretty sure. You can't base your entire life on how your kid might react anyway. It's not healthy for either of you. Besides, kids are unpredictable, just like adults. They'll eat broccoli or carrots or whatever for years and suddenly it's off the fucking menu. You can't bribe or threaten. So you let it go and the odds are in a few weeks or months they'll eat again as if nothing happened."

"Sacha told me Lola had this favorite shirt she wanted to wear every day. Sacha could barely sneak it into the laundry. A month later that shirt hit the floor and Lola outgrew it before she touched it again."

"Sometimes they'll be thrown by a little thing you never expected. And they're not being a brat, they're really upset. Then something huge you're afraid will scar them for life is no big deal. So you have to consider their welfare but you can't worry how everything will affect them. Because when they grow up the world isn't going to give a shit."

* * *

The BDS sequel was finally a go. They were looking forward to being back in Toronto with Troy and the gang and happy to be working together again. Sean, Norman and David Della Rocco went up a day early and had dinner together to catch up. They had kept in touch during the past decade, often by phone or email since actual meets were difficult to arrange. The three of them hadn't seen each other at the same time for almost three years, before Sean and Norman were together. They took turns filling each other in. Sean and Norman didn't mention their relationship. They would be catching up with a lot of old friends but no one knew of their changed status. They made appearances together but acted no differently so the general public was unaware and uninterested. Both of them had achieved cult fame status but they were far from the level of scrutiny given to Brad and Angie or the Kardashians. But Roc was more perceptive than his appearance and demeanor suggested. When their updates were finished, he asked simply, "So, how long since you two hooked up?"

Sean and Norman looked at each other and shrugged. Rocco observed more than he appeared to. They told him how it happened and then asked how obvious it was.

"Not. Obvious, I mean. But we know each other and I remember what you were like ten years ago and three years ago. It's different now. This is new."

Sean spoke. "We haven't gone public yet. Are you going to tell anyone?"

"Fuck no," Rocco said. "Real men hide their feelings because it's none of your fuckin' business."

"That's from the dream sequence," Norman said. "You're stealing material from the script."

"They're my lines," Rocco said. "It's not like plagiarism."

"You're brighter than you look, aren't you?" Sean asked.

"I work at it," Rocco said modestly.

"Really?" Norman said.

"Fuck yes. Guy that doesn't look like pearls of wisdom are going to drop from his ass, if it happens, people think he's wise and deep, shit like that."

"Rocco sees all and knows all?" Sean asked.

"Fuckin' A," Rocco agreed. "Now I gotta take a leak before we leave."

Sean and Norman smiled as Rocco ambled away. You forgot that Roc really was 'The Funny Man' when you weren't around him all the time. The waiter approached with the bill, wondering who to present it to. Sean handed over his card and the waiter went away.

Sean sighed. "We've been played by 'Sees all and knows all.' Rocco sees the waiter coming and knows he needs to take a leak."

"Yeah," Norman said. "But I got out of paying, too."

"You I can recoup my loss from in bed," Sean said. "I have no such expectation with Rocco."

"Or desire, I hope," Norman replied.

"Fuckin' A," Sean said. They were laughing when Rocco returned.

* * *

There was a lot of interest and publicity surrounding the sequel so they decided the time was right to come out officially when All Saints Day was released. They discussed it with Troy first and told him they would delay it if he'd rather not risk the opening of the movie.

"Fuck no, this is great news." Troy was enthusiastic. "You can't buy this kind of publicity. Literally. I can slash the marketing budget."

"You don't think it's the wrong kind of publicity? What if the movie tanks because of us?"

"I don't think that'll happen because who gives a shit anymore? And how important do you think you are? Because you aren't fuckin' Elton John or Sulu." Troy paused. "By the way, congratulations. I mean that sincerely. You guys are fuckin' made for each other."

Sean and Norman opted for a simple announcement with photo. They refused to be booked on a circuit of morning shows, late night shows and endless interviews with the same ground covered over and over. There was such a thing as overexposure.

The photo was a full length shot of them standing close but not quite touching. Norman was a shade shorter so he stood in front and a little to the side so he didn't block Sean. They decided against suits. They wanted to look casual but not too unkempt so they wore decent jeans with Sean in a pullover and Norman in a long sleeved tee. Sean's hands were in his back pockets and Norman's were in his front pockets. They both stood like that often and it looked and felt natural. They were smiling slightly. Sean's smile was a little wider than Norman's but it almost always was. The serious mysterious look worked for Norman. Both men looked familiar and comfortable, completely themselves. It was a striking photograph and Norman was pretty fucking pleased since he'd taken it himself.

They had never tracked publicity about themselves. A lot of people in the public eye didn't. There were so many rumors and outright lies. Even reviews of your work were suspect. If you believed the praise you had to give equal weight to the criticism. It was better to rely on your instincts. You knew if you'd done the best job you could. But this was important and they wanted to know what people were thinking. They read an article that turned out to be fairly typical of the prevailing attitude:

_"Evolution of a Fan"_  
 _In the wake of the announcement that Sean Patrick Flanery and Norman Reedus are a couple, L.A. Tempo sat down with 25 year old Greg Easton for his take on this development._

_LAT: Do you consider yourself a Boondock fan boy?_

_GE: Well, I prefer fan man but, yeah._

_LAT: Tell us about your introduction to the phenomenon._

_GE: I was 15 when the first movie came out and didn't even hear about it until 2002 when a friend saw it and was blown away and told me I had to see it. So I did and I loved it. A couple of years later I met Marla, my girlfriend, and I wanted her to see it. When she heard Flanery and Reedus were in it she said 'Hell yes.' She liked it but she said it was a little gay. I was like 'No, it's not!' but she gave me some examples and I kind of saw her point. So then I wondered if I like gay movies but she said it wasn't really gay, just homoerotic undertones, and that's what made it work. Then she asked me if she was a guy instead of a girl, would we have sex or just be friends? She's a philosophy major and gets into existential stuff like that. I'm pretty sure we'd just be friends like the rest of the guys I hang with but it made me think, you know?_

_LAT: And then the long-awaited sequel was released last week._

_GE: Yeah, we saw it together right away and we loved it but Marla says to me 'Still gay' and this time I gave her the examples. She said my thinking was evolving. Maybe so, it's like a law of survival, you know? Adapt or die._

_LAT: And right after the movie came out, so did Flanery and Reedus. What was your reaction?_

_GE: I was surprised but not shocked. Marla was a little disappointed. We've been together five years and she's the one, but I've been aware that if she actually met those guys I'd be number 3. So now my first place status is secure. It didn't seem like a big deal, not like it would have been ten or even five years ago. I guess it's news because we're just finding out but in another way it's not, because they've already been together four years. I saw them at a convention before they were together and again last year and I gotta say, I don't remember them being any different._

_LAT: So you're still a fan man?_

_GE: Sure. I love the movies and the actors. My friends talked about it. A couple of them were a little freaked and the rest of us said 'What are you going to do, boycott their movies?' They looked at us like we kicked their dog and said 'We can't. There's gonna be a third one.' And they've both done good stuff besides BDS. Who knows what else they'll do?_

* * *

Sean and Norman knew there would have to be a follow-up to the announcement but they wanted only one comprehensive interview. They were fans of independent filmmakers. Both of them had made their careers with indies and that carried over to their desire to choose the right person instead of a big name. Sherry Baxter was an L.A. journalist not very well known yet but both Sean and Norman liked her work. She was fully aware of her luck at this unexpected opportunity.

"Sean, you have a home here in L.A. Norman, your apartment is in New York. Any plans to live together?"

"Not immediately," Sean said. "We'd like to see each other more but that's not the way our lives work right now."

"Is it harder in a long distance relationship?"

"Did you mean to say that?" Norman asked. "Those exact words?"

Sherry laughed. "Okay, how does the distance affect your relationship?"

"It's a factor of course but it hasn't been much of a problem. We'd both be traveling a lot even if we lived together. We talk every day."

"I'm in L.A. regularly and Sean gets to New York several times a year. When we plan to meet, there's usually nothing else going on so we really have that time together."

"Do you get jealous or worry about finding someone else when you're apart so much?"

They glanced at each other and shook their heads. "No. We decided to rely on trust first and that worked so well that we didn't have to get jealous or paranoid. Plus we're bad liars, at least to each other."

"We've always seen through each other. That's another reason why we're together."

"Can I ask how being apart so much affects intimacy? That can't be easy."

"Sherry, what do you think happens?"

"Phone sex?"

"Yeah."

The interview went well. They spoke honestly but without too much detail and just enough humor. Near the end Sherry asked if the interview included a kiss.

"A planned display of affection?" Sean said. "I don't think so."

"We only kiss on command if it's in a script," Norman added.

Sherry let it go. "What about marriage or a commitment ceremony?"

"We don't rule it out but for now we're already committed and have been for four years."

She finished up a few more questions and then closed. "Sean Patrick Flanery and Norman Reedus. Thank you so much for sharing with us today."

As Sean and Norman stood to leave they looked at each other and had the same thought. The interview had gone just as they wanted and Sherry had not disappointed. The tone was right and she had backed off if they deflected something they didn't want to get into. It would have to happen sometime and the camera was still rolling. So they looked at each other, thought 'What the hell' and went for it.

It was a perfect kiss. They'd had a lot of practice of course but never in public. The head tilt was the right angle to align their lips without bumping noses. Mouths open but not sloppy, a hint of tongue but nothing to offend. They didn't go into a big clinch but they leaned into it enough to show they meant it. Sean's hand came up to hold Norman's head. Norman's hand gripped Sean's other arm. When it was over they turned back to Sherry.

Sean smiled. "That's for you, Sherry."

Sherry was thrilled but curious. "I thought you didn't do public displays of affection."

"Not planned ones," Norman said. "But we're spontaneous."

The video clip went viral. Hottest kiss, best kiss. It was debated in all categories, gay or straight. It was so popular that Will and Kate's royal wedding kiss on the balcony 18 months later compared unfavorably. It was what Lady Gaga thought of when she was casting her Judas video. The man who delivered the most infamous kiss in history should be played by a really good kisser. Norman had the look she was going for and he had a motorcycle.

* * *

Life is full of irony. Norman was working in L.A. for two months and he and Sean were looking forward to actually living together when Sean was asked to fill the lead in a Broadway play for three weeks. The current lead was in traction and the understudy just had emergency surgery. Sean had played the part with great success less than a year ago so naturally they thought of him first.

They had gone to bed early. They were experimenting with more frottage and less anal. Afterwards Norman lay on his back with Sean beside him propped on one elbow.

"I know this sucks," Sean said. "You just got here and now I'm leaving."

"There is an upside for me."

Sean raised his eyebrows.

"You feel guilty so you'll make it up to me when you get back."

Sean nodded. "I'm pretty sure that's going to be an upside for me, too."

"Meanwhile, since you have to leave at zero dark thirty in the morning, how about one for the road?"

"We both came half an hour ago and you're three years younger. Do you expect my recovery time to be as fast?"

"Sean, you're naked and I can see both your hands. What the fuck is poking my hip?"

Sean smiled and thrust a couple of times. "I must use this power only for good."

"I'm good," Norman replied. "I promise I'm very good."

* * *

As it turned out, Sean being in New York was fortuitous since he could step in while Norman was in L.A. Helena called on Sunday. "I'm flying to London tonight and I'll be away all week. There's a cock-up I have to sort out."

"You want to drop Mingus or shall I pick him up?"

"I'll drop him. He has a museum field trip Tuesday morning and I signed up to go. I'll call the school and cancel if you don't want to fill in."

"Which museum?" Sean asked.

"Natural History."

"Bones and stuff, cool. I'm in." Sean would have gone no matter which museum but this one would be fun.

"You're actually there to help the teacher, you know."

"Sure, but I might as well enjoy it."

"There's something else you won't enjoy. He has a dental appointment Thursday afternoon."

"Oh, man ..."

"Yes, I know what a little girl you are about the dentist. I don't understand how you can get beat up in martial arts but the sound of a drill scares you."

"No need to insult little girls. My daughter is fine at the dentist. And it's not just the drill, it's those little x-ray squares. They dig into my gums. But of course I'll take Mingus."

* * *

Back in L.A. three weeks later, Sean and Norman managed to make up for lost time.

"It's a good news/bad news thing," Sean said. "The good news is you came to L.A. for pilot season so we could live together part of the year if you got a series."

"The bad news is I had to wait for my movie shoot to finish so I got here late and decisions were already made about the series I wanted."

"The good news is they liked your audition so much they created a new character that wasn't even in the source material."

"The bad news is it shoots in Atlanta so we're still not going to be living together."

"The good news is when we are together, I'm sleeping with Daryl Dixon."

"Yeah, okay. You win."

They lay thinking about what made it work between them. Quite simply, they were happy. There was a lot of love, laughter, talking, and sex. They had serious conversations and silly ones and smutty ones. They enjoyed them all. Sometimes talking was better than sex. But mostly talking was better after sex, not instead of.

"Do you think about how lucky we are to be together?" Sean asked.

"Every day. Because the years we weren't together didn't feel so lucky."

"We gave each other up over and over after we met. Until it was our time."

"We deserve each other."

"And we finally got what we deserve."


End file.
